Sunday, November 23, 2014

It Is NOT Good

So, I've recently decided that it's a self-control issue more than a weight loss issue.

Wait.. maybe I should back up.

This is me.

                                                       Obligatory selfie.
Day in the sun with the hubster,
Name: Christy
Age: 34
Occupation: Artist & Wifey
Likes: Creating in my art journal, most music, fashion, make-up, thoughtful gestures, and I'm kind of an adrenaline junkie. And therein lies the problem. 

I want to do all of these crazy things like be a runner, learn to surf, do pull-ups, earn my black belt in Isshin-Ryu karate, run those crazy obstacle races, learn to kayak, go hiking, rock climb, zip line, sky dive, scuba dive, do those advanced yoga poses.. I think you get the point.

Did I mention that I'm 328.6 pounds? 

This is officially the heaviest I've ever weighed. 

I've started and stopped more weight loss programs than I care to admit. I've followed weight-loss plan after weight-loss plan, only to give up. I've done that SO many times that I'm really having trouble believing that I can lose the weight. I honestly cannot picture what I would look like at a healthy weight. 

Over the past few years I have seen person after person that I care about suffer from diseases and health concerns that could be prevented with  a healthy diet and exercise. Recently  a woman who I love very much passed away.after suffering from multiple health concerns. I just keep whispering to myself that it didn't have to be that way.

It didn't have to be that way for her.

It doesn't have to be that way for me.

My current weight and life style are unacceptable.

I was reflecting over these heartbreaking events after spending time with scripture, and I was reminded that self-control is a fruit of the spirit (Galatians 5: 22-23). I tearfully and honestly examined where I do not currently exercise the self-control that was given to me when Christ was crucified for my sins. That list is much longer than I expected, but here is part of it:
  • I do nothing to help with household expenses (other than work). Except for rent, I pay zero bills. 
  • I don't even check the account, or balance the check book.
  • I do not concern  myself with keeping my home clean.
  • I don't cook. We spend good money on healthy & fresh food, but I don't cook it.
  • I don't walk the dog.
Ouch, being transparent hurts.

Who picks up the slack? The person that I love most. My kind and generous husband. He's the love of my life. He pays all bills, keeps finances in order, does the laundry and dishes, and cooks. We play 'rock, paper, scissors' to determine who takes the dog out. I have realized that my lack of self-control is the height of selfishness, and my soul-mate has been left to carry the burden. This is also unacceptable. 

Ten year wedding vow renewal.

Getting ready for Kidz Camp!

I think you can see what I mean at the start of this post about the issue not being just about weight loss.



Eat clean/paleo/michi's ladder. Is that vague enough? I plan to mostly eat paleo breakfast and lunches, with a clean dinner.

Make meal plans, and prep the meals.

Move every day.

5 days of the week I am going to get in at least 30 minutes of exercise. I plan to begin by walking in the park across the street. It has a half-mile walking path, and I am going to start with three laps.

Find a dojo. I earned my brown belt in Isshin-Ryu karate in July, then moved a good part of the way across the state. My sensei  and I had a 'best case scenario'  that  ended up falling through. This week I will make contact with the two Isshin-Ryu dojo's that I know of in the area and plan to observe some classes. 

Mental Health:
Pray and acknowledge that I cannot do this alone, but that I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me. 

Cut myself some slack. This can't be an 'all-or-nothing' thing. I have to find what works for me (and what doesn't).

Be transparent with those of you reading this. I plan on giving you the good, the bad, and the ugly.

Today's Plan of Attack:
Start this blog (check).
Cook and EAT a healthy dinner (Pork loin and sweet potatoes - check).
Do the dishes.
Don't make an unrealistic plan of attack that will leave me feeling overwhelmed and anxious. 

What?!? I've cooked dinner AND am going to do the dishes, also? See, this blog is already helping! Lol. Thanks for joining me on this journey!!

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